this one
Mid City Meddler

Mid City Meddler
By Muffy Junes

Dog Day Afternoon

Why must I feel like that? Why must I chase the cat? It's nothing but the dog in me.

These are some words about dogs. Dog references abound in the English language. It's like ... power to the hairy four paws.

While an unfaithful man might be referred to as a dog, the dog is man's best friend. I accidentally caught a piece of the Ricki Lake show where "buds" were calling each other dogs - "yoo no yoo my dawg." Sometimes you might have to dog your dog, especially if your dog is a "pussy" or a "wussy." Such dogging could lead to a cat fight.

George Clinton encouraged us to "do" the dog, on the dance floor. The Baja Men tried to make us wonder who it was that let the dogs out of someplace. During the short popularity of "Who Let The Dogs Out," I have been nauseated and incredulous at the large numbers of men who embraced the opportunity to bark loudly together, as if it were a Warrior Weekend for middle-aged denial. I'm not doggin' them, it's just that I think they looked like pussies. I guess I go more for the "lone wolf" type. Women may bark like dogs occasionally, but it usually sounds non-threatening, like a small family pet. Women don't usually bark en masse.

I have had an on-going peeve (guess it's a "pet" peeve) regarding leash-less dogs in public places - specifically, laundromats in the Highlands, where dog walkers are everywhere. There's even "Dog Hill" in Cherokee Park. One day I was playing Pacman in Wash-O-Rama, waiting for the doggone dryers to finish. A large pooch walked up and snooted me. Now, that's a violation, in my opinion. I twirled around and started dogging the pet owner. I like to say, "Don't you know there's a leash law!" (I'm not exactly sure if there is, but I've always heard it's so.) The offenders just look at me kinda doggedly and croon out something like, "My Samson wouldn't hurt a fly." or something stupid like that. Then, I explain that I realize it's not the dog's fault. So I smack the owner upside the head for snooting me.

A few weeks ago, I was in Clothes Encounter. There were a couple of dogs just walking around, as if they were looking for an open washer. Being dog-tired, I let it go. As I was leaving through the back door, I looked up and saw a whole roomful of canines ogling me. I rubbed my eyes, looked again, and they were still there, wiggling and jumping at the glass-enclosed walls.

Well, I thought it was strange and very cute, since they were not unattended and not snooting me. I walked over and discovered a little doggy daycare center called "Barkstown." One large room held about a dozen poochies; all sizes, ages and colors, happily co-existing 'til Mommy comes home. (Why can't we all just get along?) Brightly lit with colorful doodles on the walls, Barkstown is a happy place. The dogs work on their own personal tricks, go for daily walks and enjoy supervised indoor play. A full day, up to twelve hours, is a mere $15. They also have a family plan for two or more dogs, pick up and drop off, grooming, and other options available. New owners Nancy McDonald, R.N., and Karen Johnson are more than willing to accommodate your dog while you work, shop or...go to the laundromat. Barkstown doggy daycare and boutique is located at 915 Baxter Ave. The phone # is 479-8833. So long, I have to...er.. go see a man about a dog! (heart) Muff

Call or email me with your band/ Mid City info: (502) 485-1989 / mufalata@iglou.com